Ponder the Thought

South Jersey

                SOUTH JERSEY OR SOUT JOISEY?

By John Leon                                                                                    

I have been living at the Jersey Shore area all of my life, having grown up in Brigantine and now reside in a suburb of Atlantic City, which now encompasses a half a decade. There’s been one thing that’s really bothered me all these years and it’s when people refer to different parts of South Jersey. There’s only one South Jersey and it’s the place I live in.

It’s been made famous by Bruce Springsteen’s “Atlantic City”, songs like “Under the Boardwalk” and “Wildwood Days”. Springsteen himself hailed from the Asbury Park area on the shoreline of Jersey, but not South Jersey.

However. Let’s delve a bit deeper shall we? The Jersey Shore is NOT: “Down ashore” and it’s CERTAINLY not anywhere remotely west of Hammonton.

Voorhees, Cherry Hill, Marlton, Blackwood, Williamstown, etc., is NOT, I repeat NOT, South Jersey. They are suburbs of Philly and if you don’t want to believe me, just listen to the South Philadelphia accents on these people.

“Hey yo, you goin’ to Sout Josiey this weekend?”

They consider themselves part of South Jersey but are Camden, Burlington and Gloucester Counties really considered south? South of where?

Are the residents of Atlantic City, Ventnor, Sea Isle, Wildwood, Cape May, etc., living in Southern New Jersey? Seems like South Jersey to me doesn’t it? Seaside Heights, Asbury Park (Sorry, Bruce), Long Beach Island are not South Jersey. They are on the coast of CENTRAL JERSEY!

I don’t want to hear about how geographically they may be, let’s be honest here; they are NOT the real South Jersey. They’re just not.

News and weather reporters always refer to the Shore area, but never reference the South Jersey area. Athletes who play for the professional sports teams in Philadelphia apparently live in South Jersey but again, Voorhees, Cherry Hill, etc.

They always show you the “Harrah’s Cam” for the morning weather and the only time they make the trip down here is when there’s a hurricane coming or there’s some kind of charity walk/run, or major catastrophe, etc.

In the midst of it all are the Shoobies, again people that think they are from “South” Jersey who invade the REAL South Jersey area during the summer months and make the locals crazier than we already are. Try driving on the Expressway or Parkway during a Friday afternoon or Sunday afternoon and look to see how many Pennsylvania tags there are or how many Cherry Hill or Audubon car dealerships are on the trunk lid.

It’s getting ridiculous and I just want what’s due to us, the respect of being the REAL South Jersey area and everyone west of Mays Landing should just cut it out.

Even Mays Landing, Egg Harbor City and Hammonton are pushing the limits of South Jersey but we’ll keep them in for now. Mays Landing is the Atlantic County seat so we have to keep them in. All of Atlantic, Cape May and Ocean County are South Jersey, THAT’S IT!

Everyone else can make up their own name but just don’t say it’s South Jersey because it’s not. The Eastern Suburb of Philadelphia would work. It’s just the same as North Jersey being the suburbs of New York City. Come on now; tell me it’s not! How else could you have the New York Giants and New York Jets playing in New Jersey and not feel that way. At least the New Jersey Nets and New Jersey Devils had the decency to change their names, and don’t tell me about the tradition of the Giants. If they kept to their tradition, they wouldn’t be building a new stadium in, ready….. NEW JERSEY! Go back to Yankee Stadium; they’re tearing it down anyway. The Jets can go back to Shea, because the Mets are building a new stadium right next door. If you’re going to name your teams the New York Giants/Jets then play there for crying out loud.

We here at the Shore, and I do mean the South Jersey shore, would appreciate it if everyone would just allow us to live here and everyone else can stay out, Take your goofy names and live in the Philly suburbs. Visiting is fine but know when to go home, like soon.

It’s like the slogan says,” Welcome to South Jersey, now GO HOME!”

The King is here

                          WHEN I’M KING OF THE WORLD…..

With apologies to Bill Conlin – Philadelphia Daily News

By John Leon                                                                                    

When I’m King of the World--- Atlantic City will have a baseball franchise that’s worthy of having 2000-3000 fans in the seats every night. I’m not bashing the players, in fact, the players should have every opportunity to make a living and have every opportunity to try and make it to “The Show”. The more opportunities to play the better the odds. All I’m asking is that the front offices run the damn thing properly. Is that too much?

When I’m King of the World—The Phillies will stop teasing us with promises of pennants and playoffs every year just to fall short. Put the money that is spent into the farm system again and leave it there!! It works and is proven time and time again, just look at the roster. Rollins, Utley, Howard, Burrell, Ruiz, Dobbs, Bourne, Myers, Hamels, Madsen, Zagurski.  Hellooooo?? Stop the madness with the free agent contracts unless Babe Ruth or Walter Johnson comes back. They’ve made some God-awful decisions and then they’ve made the wrong ones on keepers. Rowand – sign him. Howard re-sign him. Bring Carrasco up and find some more bullpen help. It can be done I know it. See template Atlanta Braves.

When I’m King of the World—Any athlete that drives drunk and gets caught, with all the money that they’re making, ought to have his license revoked FOREVER! There’s no excuse for stupidity, even millionaires. You mean to tell me that they can’t afford a limo for the night?? Let them work for a year in the jobs that the average fan has and see if they doesn’t appreciate the sport a little better.

When I’m King of the World – Have every athlete pass a test on the history of his or her sport. Nothing aggravates me more than seeing these young athletes not have a clue about the men or women that came before them so that they could have the lifestyle that they now enjoy.

When I’m King of the World – Have an athlete learn how to speak to reporters properly. Watch how they answer questions with the “you knows” and “I means”. Give a cliché or something huh? How about the schools hiring some reporters and media to help them? It will only help in the long run because if you can speak intelligently you instantly become more marketable. Your pro career is NOT, I repeat NOT, going to last forever, but your marketability will.

When I’m King of the World—Reporters who cover high school sports will be paid better than they are. As a colleague of mine pointed out, when you’re covering a pro or college team, the coaches and players are presented to you. The stats are done for you. In high school you have to keep you’re own stats, have to fend for yourself with players and coaches, although they are usually pretty good about that, and eat later, much later. Not glorious but it’s the purest sense of the game. A players’ first time with the media is an experience every writer should have.

When I’m King of the World—Major League Baseball umpires will NOT affect the outcomes of games with their ridiculous strike zones. It’s the last part of the season and many teams are vying for the playoffs, so why now do you change the zone? Some of these guys have a bigger strike zone than Eric Gregg (see Marlins v. Braves playoffs) I’ve witnessed more ejections, blown calls and unbelievable strikes than at any time during my years of playing, studying and watching the game. You are there to arbitrate the game, not be part of it!

When I’m King of the World—“The Man Show” and “Married with Children” will be a staple in every man’s video library. Just had to throw that in there.

            Part 2 coming very shortly to a computer near you.

Mailman

.                       BOY, I’D LIKE YOUR JOB TODAY

Or So you want to be a Mailman?

By John Leon

            It never ceases to amaze me how people can be so cruel. In my livelihood as a Letter Carrier for the United States Postal Service (or snail mail to you web heads), I’m constantly reminded of the weather. Especially on nice, sunny, springtime type days.

How many times have you said to your delivery person, “What a day? You must really love this weather?” Come on now, you know you’ve done it. And, of course, the polite response you give is, “Yes it is nice.”

But in our minds, we have some really snappy answers to that insanely stupid question. You have absolutely no idea how many times we just want to say something that would blow the minds of our customers. Below are just some of the answers we’d like to give to some of these comments.

-         “Boy, I’d like your job today!” – Really? How about the days when the rain is coming down sideways and it’s 10 degrees out?

-         “I feel for you today. I can’t believe they make you deliver in this weather.” – Oh that’s OK, I’d like to take the winter off but for some reason I wouldn’t get paid.

-         “Where have you been? On vacation again?” – Yep, those 10 weeks in the Bahamas sure do wonders huh?

-         “Where’s my check?” – Oh I cashed that using your name. Thank you for helping me make my mortgage this month.

-         During Election Day, when everyone else is off except the Postal Service. “I didn’t think there was mail today.” – There’s mail everyday.

And, of course, my favorite. The mail has always been delivered on Saturday, all day, but yet, people constantly say to me,

“You only work half day today right?” – I wish but for some reason, if I only worked half day then only half the route would get mail.

Or a day like today for example. Winds blowing at gusts up to 40 MPH, temperature at 17 degrees and the wind chill at 5 degrees and below. Answer me this Riddler, what kind of normal human being would even attempt to work in weather like this when all the warning signs are out that the temps are at dangerous levels?

Letter Carriers that’s who!!! Normal? I think not, but this is what we do. And we’ve been doing it longer and better than anyone else in the world for a cheaper rate than anyone else in the world. 39 cents is cheaper than your cell phone and so maybe we can’t get it there within seconds but the next time your internet service bill comes, you may want to reconsider the tongue lashing you gave your “Mailman” for getting the mail to your house late.

Sigmund Freud wouldn’t touch the mentality that we all have. When we go out to deliver YOUR mail in times like these, we have to be crazy right? Now, the times like these don’t happen very often I’ll grant you, but there’s not one of us that wouldn’t want to be somewhere were we could have a nice recliner with a warm blanket covering us watching television or curled up with a good book, and a nice hot “toddy” or something similar.

Want my job today? Didn’t think so.

I’ve been called nuts on more than a few occasions and after a day like today I am starting to wonder if the rumors aren’t true.

So the next time you come across your favorite Letter Carrier, consider what inane things you say to them. It may wind up on the net.

  WHAT’S WRONG WITH THE WAY I LOOK?

         The primer for the fashion challenged

By John Leon

            

I’ll be first one to tell you that I’m a jeans and sneakers kind of guy. I like to be comfortable and there is nothing wrong with that. But lately, as I’ve admittedly gotten older, my daughters, whom I love with all my heart, have found the need to want to dress Daddy a little better. I have no idea why. It was OK before I got married so why not now?

First let’s review how I got to this point and a lot of it has to do with the jobs I now have. Before I got married I played baseball and softball and that’s how I met my wife in a nutshell. The way I dressed going to banquets only required me to get gussied up a couple of times a year. You know the usual banquet circuit, the odd wedding, funeral, etc., and I was OK with that. The rest of the time it was uniforms or shorts and jeans.

My real job with the Post Office required me to wear a uniform, so no problem there. Then after I retired as an active ballplayer, I started getting into radio, writing for a newspaper and working for the Atlantic City Surf, first as the PA Announcer then the radio play-by-play guy.

Hence the daughters.

“Dad you can’t go out dressed like that!” my youngest daughter said. “Why not? I’m only going to the game?” I replied. “Because in your position you need to look a little better,” she said.

Ok, sweatshirt, jeans and sneakers to cover football and basketball games aren’t good enough? In my mind this isn’t Project Runway by any stretch. I did see some of my peers dressed a little better than I, although not suit and tie, but nice polo and decent slacks. I relented, begrudgingly.

Slowly my wardrobe became a few less tee shirts and more long sleeve shirts and polo’s with collars. A clotheshorse I’m not. The sneakers have given way to docksiders and Bass shoes. Now I get the looks and comments from people that have known me for years asking me where I’m going after the game all dressed up. No pleasing these people.

When I became a radio guy again I get,” Dad, where are your nice shirts?”

Let me get this straight. I’m on the radio; no one can see me and I must get dressed up? Confusion sets in and at this point I’m starting to wonder why I had girls.

Once again, I relent and start to look more “professional”. Let’s review once more, shall we? These are part-time jobs I’m holding and now my appearance means something? Yes I know, that you represent the team, etc., but come on! I’m on the radio, not television. By my being more” professional” does that made me sound better? Did my clothing affect my knowledge of the game and somehow I became Vin Scully?

I’m doing my laundry and notice that more and more of my clothes DO NOT go into the dryer anymore. When did this get away from me and where did I go wrong? My wardrobe was OK when I was single, or at least I thought so.

So it’s come to this, that every Christmas or birthday, I receive a new shirt, pair of pants, or gift certificate to Kenneth Cole, Columbia or some other men’s clothing store with the directive to go get something nice. Great! Fashion maven that I am, the person or those people, also accompanies me that gave me the gift. What? You don’t trust me?

It’s not that I’m not appreciative of their efforts, because I am. But after the games, I find myself looking for the guy that didn’t look that bad (in my mind) in jeans and sneakers and he’s starting to disappear into the sunset.

“Mirror, mirror on the all, I’m turning into my father after all.”

Mailman

                        BOY, I’D LIKE YOUR JOB TODAY

Or So you want to be a Mailman?

By John Leon

            It never ceases to amaze me how people can be so cruel. In my livelihood as a Letter Carrier for the United States Postal Service (or snail mail to you web heads), I’m constantly reminded of the weather. Especially on nice, sunny, springtime type days.

How many times have you said to your delivery person, “What a day? You must really love this weather?” Come on now, you know you’ve done it. And, of course, the polite response you give is, “Yes it is nice.”

But in our minds, we have some really snappy answers to that insanely stupid question. You have absolutely no idea how many times we just want to say something that would blow the minds of our customers. Below are just some of the answers we’d like to give to some of these comments.

-         “Boy, I’d like your job today!” – Really? How about the days when the rain is coming down sideways and it’s 10 degrees out?

-         “I feel for you today. I can’t believe they make you deliver in this weather.” – Oh that’s OK, I’d like to take the winter off but for some reason I wouldn’t get paid.

-         “Where have you been? On vacation again?” – Yep, those 10 weeks in the Bahamas sure do wonders huh?

-         “Where’s my check?” – Oh I cashed that using your name. Thank you for helping me make my mortgage this month.

-         During Election Day, when everyone else is off except the Postal Service. “I didn’t think there was mail today.” – There’s mail everyday.

And, of course, my favorite. The mail has always been delivered on Saturday, all day, but yet, people constantly say to me,

“You only work half day today right?” – I wish but for some reason, if I only worked half day then only half the route would get mail.

So the next time you come across your favorite Letter Carrier, consider what inane things you say to them. It may wind up on the net.

The Fans - Jekyll and Hyde

       Has anyone been watching the fans at games lately? It has been neat to observe the behavior of parents, students and regular die-hard fans at sporting events. It's the Jekyll and Hyde syndrome and Dr. Phil wouldn't even touch this subject. Mild mannered, everyday people are living out thir fantasies every week by painting up, dressing up (some badly I might add) and making complete fools of themselves. Now don't get me wrong, I think it's wonderful that teams have a loyal following and that they root for their favorite teams/players, but it starts at the grade school and high school level and works it's way up. It is born into some families and gets passed from generation to generation. I've seen high school games where there is not a chance in this universe that I would EVER be a referee or umpire. There is not enough money in the world to put me in their place and I give them all the credit in the world, and their job is getting tougher and tougher. The players are bigger and more physical than they have ever been, and THAT'S JUST THE GIRLS!

          Some stuff is really funny though. I covered a local high school game recently and discover that the team's colors are black and orange. Naturally, some of the students in the rooting section wore Department of Corrections orange jumpsuits with the school's name on the back. Now that's funny! And we've all seen the fanatics that paint themselves and just have to take off their shirts in 15 degree weather. I don't want to say there is some...anti-freeze involved, but that's not sane thinking in my mind. The best paint job goes to the fan at the Michigan-USC game on New Year's Day. He had his bald pate, painted like the design on the Michigan helmet. Very creative!

         So let's keep the fans creativity coming and please enjoy the games. Lord knows there is enough violence in the world and the sporting coliseums are not the place for that.

The Mind is Willing but......

                                    THE MIND IS WILLING…

By John Leon                                                                           Friday January 13, 2006

            Friday the 13^th. Ah yes, time to reflect on all of the supposed bad things that can happen to a person on this date. Yes, we all know the stories of Mary Leeds, who allegedly gave birth to the 13^th child on the 13^th and it turned into the Jersey Devil. I think what’s worse is that, as we get older, and yes, I’m one of those people you start to believe what your mind tells you to do.

            I’m one of those people that as a former athlete that primarily played baseball and softball for a combined 40 years, my mind still relives the days when I could do things better than some other mortals could not do. I’m not blowing my own horn, but when you make 14 consecutive all-star teams that’s not an accident.

            Ah yes, the mind. We’ve all heard of it. A mind is a terrible thing to waste, mind over matter, sometimes you lose your mind, (although at my age sometimes I can’t remember where I placed it) anyway, you get the idea. Getting back to the previous paragraph, your mind can definitely play tricks on you and it really gets a charge out of seeing how far it can push your body.

            Hatfield’s vs. McCoy’s, Yankees vs. Red Sox, mind vs. body, rivalries one and all. Case in point, one day a year I’m asked to play in a charity softball contest. I’m not the only one either as many of my former teammates come to relive the days when we were younger, what we used to do or how much fun it was in winning games and tournaments. I’ve only been retired for 11 years now so you would think that I’m still in pretty fair playing shape. WRONG!!!

            Let’s review shall we? 40 years of competitive sports minus 11 years of retirement equals the fantasy that I can still competitively participate in a game. Stop laughing; it hurts too much to even laugh.

            Every year I say the same thing, that I will no longer try this futile exercise in playing in a 7-inning softball game again. And every year I foolishly get myself prepared, just as I used to, and get laughed at by my wife and daughters. I knew it was time to retire when it took me longer to stretch and get loose than it did to actually play the game, but my mind says,” yes you can, you can go out there and perform just like you did when you were 30”. I just gotta stop listening to my mind like Pavlov’s Dog, and go out there salivating at the fact that “sure I can”.

            NO I CAN’T!! That little 7-inning “charity” game that I just played gets the juices flowing and then you try to do too much, again trying to do what you USED to be able to do. One hour to get loose, one hour to play the game and seven painful days to recover. What could I have POSSIBLY been thinking? It’s almost like Lucy holding the ball for Charlie Brown to kick it and, well you know the rest.

            So when your buddies try to get you to help out in that charity game or want you to get together to play touch football just like the old days, tell them that they were the old days and they were great. Then crack another beer and root them on.